Sunday, December 14, 2014

Thoughts from a Random Brain

Life is a roller coaster.

Why am I being ignored... invisible... again.

Why can't he see that I care.

What did I do or say that was wrong?

Why is it I'm always attracted to the ones who could careless. 

I tried. I made mistakes. I said things I shouldn't have. I wish I could take it back. 

We were friends once... now I dont know what we are.

I dont want the world or a fairy tale. I just want a friendship. A friendship that is true, not finicky or based on the tides of moods and conveniences... why is that so much to ask.

I thought it would be different somehow. I wanted someone to fight for  me, to challenge me, to pursue me. Why am I so difficult to love. Why do I push back and block off...

I'm mad at myself. Why do I allow this to happen to me. I wish I did not care so much. I want to fix this but I cant. I cant fix something that is  broken between two people... especailly when the other person, doesnt want it 'fixed'.


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